>PERMISSION TO SCREAM… (*updated)

19 Jun

>I’m sorry…
I’m going to scream:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH……!!!!!!!!!
!”£$%^@&*()(%$£%(*&^%$£”!”£$%*&^%^&%$%^%$££
@$%^&*&^%***£$%^$^&^*&$55987^*%&6547^*)
(&_90U)(^0876*)&(*uS98tb8DGTY(h*u

(OOOPS apparently I swore as well…)

Aaah. That’s better.
My apologies, blogworld!

I will elaborate in my next post, with the hope that, by then, I will have gained a little perspective.
Suffice to say for now that I’m not particularly enjoying parenting my 7 year-old at the moment.
For those of you who pray, PLEASE please pray for a breakthrough – instead of a breakdown – in my relationship with my eldest son. I love Sam, but he is driving me to distraction. It’s tough. Full Stop. Period. Whatever.
_______________________________________________________

* Well it would seem that there has indeed been a turnaround since I wrote this, which was only last night, but feels like forever ago.

I guess with ADHD, there is a lot of unpredictablility. And I’m having to learn to cut Sam a bit more slack than maybe one would under different cirumstances.

So after posting the above, I was desperately praying for some answers. And unearthed the wonderful book on ADHD by Dr Christopher Green, called “Understanding ADHD“. What a godsend, and what fount of wisdom!! After reading the chapter on ‘Encouraging self-esteem’ I realised where I had been going wrong. It’s an easy, typical, well-known parenting error…

I had recently become totally bogged down by Sam’s negative behaviour, and his persistent refusals to cooperate with anything I was asking of him; and in doing so had stopped looking at all the positive stuff, all the praise-worthy aspects of his behaviour, of which there are many – many more than I give him credit for… I had even started putting him ‘down’, and attacking him as a person, sometimes calling him ‘stupid’ – which is a NO-NO in parenting at the best of times!!
Oh my how I’ve gone wrong!!! I felt really convicted reading this and felt I needed to say sorry. And I have turned over a new leaf, as of this morning. It feels like night and day. He told me ‘I love you Mummy’ at least 5 times today. We have laughted, tickled each other, and been really good friends.

I will write more some other time about this wonderful, amazing, bright, big Sam of mine. But for now, all is well, and there is definitely healing in the praise of a child. God is so gracious!!

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